Awards Time!

We wrapped up another Division V title, going 9-3 and sharing the crown with JJ's Catering. (By the way, Tap Outs vs. JJ's is the Quincy Park District's answer to Cubs-Cards and Saux-Yanks.)

The judge and jury for the awards — DOB — has cooked these up. Like them? Don't like them? Leave a comment.

Here we go:

Least Valuable Player

If you blinked, you may have missed Jared Bell's time as a member of the Tap Outs. Work forced him to miss some games early on. By the time his slow time at work rolled around, he was nowhere to be found. He wound up leaving Quincy after about six months to head back home, leaving the Tap Outs with a hole on their roster.

We'll have to find someone to replace him on the 2011 roster. It shouldn't be too tough.

Past winners:

2008: Shawny

2007: Diamond Dave (who I still couldn't pick out of a lineup)

2006: Grape Ape

Play of the Year

He's our Kirk Gibson.

A bad back kept Hitman Hart out of the lineup for most of the season. However, we guilted him into coming back for a July 15 game against Hootey's. The game started out ugly as the Tap Outs trailed 14-1 at one point early on.

But your diamond warriors scratched and clawed their way back into the game, eventually forcing extra innings — despite some pretty terrible third-base coaching by DOB. Let's go back to that night, which happended to be Jazzy Jeff's birthday:

With two on and two out, Hitman stepped to the plate. He grabbed at the small of his back as he entered the box. On the first pitch he saw, he laced a shot to straightaway center field. For a second, it appeared the Hootey's center fielder was going to catch it. But as he made a move on the ball, he slipped and the ball sailed over his head to the wall.

Hart, eating up nine feet of dirt with each one of his strides, quickly circled the bases. By the time the Hootey's folks got the ball, he was already near third base. There was no play at the plate this time as the Tap Outs prevailed to improve to 7-1 on the season.

The play was, quite possibly, the highlight of the Hitman's softball career.

Past winners:

2008: Rob Base (for a comedy of errors)

2007: DOB (for picking off a member of the Cooler Boyz at first base)

2006: Ed (for the now infamous self-inflicted wedgie while playing right field)

Rookie of the Year

We'll have more on this year's recipient, Scotty 2 Hotty, later in the program

Past winners:

2008: Bad Brad (Whatever happened to him?)

2007: Jazzy Jeff

2006: Shawny

2005: DOB (only award given after the year)

Ed Sprague Memorial Bonehead Play of the Year

In the season finale, DOB showed why he doesn't score very many runs.

First of all, he has to get on base, which didn't happen as often this year as it has in the past. Secondly, he has to listen to his third base coach when he has a chance to put a run on the board.

The Tap Outs were well on their way to a win, but DOB for some reason failed to looked at Cory in The House in the third base coaches box late in the game. With the left fielder fumbling the ball, Cory decided to send DOB, who decided to stop between third base and home. For some reason, DOB — after stopping for a good two seconds — took off toward home again.

He was out by a mile, drawing the ire and ridicule of his Tap Outs teammates.

Maybe DOB will get better at running the bases next year.

Past winners:

2008: Kriss Kross (for being the victim of the world's first ever 3-1-2-3 putout)

2007: Kriss Kross (for having two E-10s in the same inning, which led to him being replaced by the Weamster)

2006: The Weamster (for breaking his hand after pounding it on the ground during a blowout loss to Snap-On Tools)

Most Improved Player

Don't know that we had a Most Improved Player. All of us did pretty good for being off an entire year. I'll give the nod to one of our most consistent players during our time as Demons/Tap Outs.

Big John Studd quietly goes about his business at first base and hitting in the middle of the lineup. He's a rock from which the franchise's foundation is built around.

Past winners

2008: None (we stunk)

2007: Nick the Quick

2006: DOB

Most Valuable Player

If it wasn't for Scotty 2 Hotty, who knows where the Tap Outs would have finished. He was a pretty good anchor at the top of the lineup, hitting mostly in the No. 2 spot behind Eric B.

Not only did he consistently get on base, but he also made outstanding plays in the field throughout the season. He made a pair of web gems in the season finale that would have been up for Play of the Year had it not been for Hitman Hart's walk-off heroics against Hootey's.

Past winners

2008: Jazzy Jeff

2007: Shawny

2006: Hitman Hart

That does it for this year.

If you're one of the millions of Tap Outs fans, make sure to check back next April when we begin our pursuit of yet another league crown.

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!

Talk about your comebacks.

After taking a year off because of sponsorship difficulties, the team formerly known as the Demons once again ran roughshod over the always-competitive, sometimes-comedic Quincy Park District Thursday Night Division V slow-pitch softball league.

By fashioning a 9-3 record, the new Ted's Shirt Shack Tap Outs wound up taking the D-V title for the second time in franchise history. The Tap Outs tied with JJ's Catering for the crown after JJ's gagged it off on the final night of the season to allow the Tap Outs a chance to tie for the crown.

It's another glorious moment in club history. Congrats to Kriss Kross for putting together a team that is suddenly morphing into the New York Yankees of Quincy Park District softball.

Other than the Hitman, I think most everyone else should be back as we try to make it three titles in five years.

Coming up — the annual team awards.

Game 12 Report — Tap Outs 14, Entrup 5

Do you believe in miracles?

As Al Michaels said at the end of the U.S-Russia hockey game in the 1980 Olympics — "YES!!!!"

Going into their Quincy Park District Division V season finale, your diamond heroes needed some divine intervention to come away with the league title. First, they needed to beat an Entrup team that had shocked them just two weeks ago.

Mission No. 1 was accomplished easily enough.

After polishing off the painters and dry wallers — who I must add do excellent work — the Tap Outs needed league-leading JJ's Catering to turd up against Hootey's Bar and Grill. JJ's came into the game with a 9-2 record, while Hootey's came in with a sub-.500 record.

A funny thing happened on the way to JJ's coronation as league champs — the lost 13-12 in the worst possible way. Hootey's took a 13-9 lead thanks to a five-run inning in the top of the seventh.

JJ's came back to make it a 13-12 game and had a runner on first and two outs with one of their best players at the plate. (I don't think the guy at the plate was on their roster, but whatever.) JJ's hired gun wound up lacing a shot to center field that rolled to the wall. He motored around the bases, but there was one problem — the guy who was on first fell down. The hired gun zipped past his fallen teammate while running the bases. As a result, he was called out for the third out of the inning and the end of the game.

As a result, JJ's and the Tap Outs finish the season with identical 9-3 records. According to Quincy Park District rules, the first tiebreaker is head-to-head competition. JJ's and the Tap Outs split two games this year. The Tap Outs won the first game 9-5, but lost the second 5-1. The second tiebreaker is run differential. Again, the teams are tied.

There was no third tiebreaker listed. From where I sit, JJ's win over the Tap Outs has a huge asterisk since DOB was not in attendance. We've seen that the Tap Outs are susceptible when DOB isn't in the lineup.

Who knows what the park district is going to do with the tiebreaker. We'll keep you posted once team skipper Kriss Kross hears of the decision.

As for the Tap Outs' win on Thursday night at Upper Moorman, it was a fairly easy one. Kriss Kross, playing with a hamstring injury, did fine in the circle, but got some help from his defense. No one was better on defense than Scottie Too Hottie at shortstop. He made a diving catch on a line drive and also dove for a fly ball down the left-field line to help keep Entrup in line.

Offensively, the Tap Outs scored five runs in the first inning and rolled from there. DOB went 1-or 4 and was thrown out at home on the worst base-running play of the season. DOB decided to stop between third base and home on a hit to left field, even though Cory in the house was sending him home. DOB was thrown out by a country mile.

However, Division V's best backstop made up for in in the next inning. He correctly asked for an appeal on a guy who tried to tag up from third. The umps called the guy — who left a good second early — out for the last out of the inning.

It appears the most of the Tap Outs plan to return for the 2011 season. Stay tuned to the blog in the upcoming days for the results of where we finish with the tiebreaker as well as the year-ending team honors.

Rodney's post-game presser

Here's some video shot by future Tap Outs player Matt Hopf from Hitman Hart's retirement ceremony:

Game 11 Report — Tap Outs 14, Outdoor Power 9

This one was for the Hitman.

In a dramatic turn of events earlier this week, long-time Demons/Tap Outs stalwart Rodney "Hitman" Hart announced that Thursday's Division V game would be his last. Unlike that diva Brett Favre, the Hitman was steadfast in his retirement announcement.

His decision caught the team by surprise. Manager Kriss Kross couldn't even bring himself to watch the Hitman's swansong.

And what an exit it was. The Hitman's night got off to a rough start as he fell backward trying to catch a fly ball in center field and had the ball pop out of his glove. It was part of a five-run first inning or the Power Crew.

He quickly made amends though by bashing a two-run homer deep to center field as the Tap Outs quickly established themselves as the more dominant team. Mired in a two-game losing streak, the Tap Outs flexed their collective muscle to cruise to the win, pushing their record to 8-3.

Plenty of highlights in this one. Jazzy Jeff was back on the mound and dealt a winner. He had a strikeout and generally baffled the Outdoor Power Crew after that rough opening inning. DOB triggered a rare 2-5-3 double play and the middle infield also turned a DP, too. Heck, DOB even had a double down the line in the first inning as part of a seven-run first inning.

With dozens and dozens of people watching, Hitman conducted a postgame retirement speech that will soon be up on his blog.

It's been an honor to play alongside the Hitman for these seasons. Maybe we can keep him in the organ-eye-zation by coaxing him into coaching the Tap Outs. Hitman said he'd be open to that suggestion.

We'll try to close out the season next week at 7. Hopefully, the injured Kriss Kross will be back.