Game 3 Report — Tap Outs 10, Hooey's 0

After two weeks of rainouts, the Ted's Shirt Shack Tap Outs were back in action at Upper Moorman against a group of young upstarts. The old men had no problem with the youngin's making them submit via the mercy rule.

It was really a solid all-around night for the Tap Outs. We hit up and down the order, got some solid pitching from Jazzy Jeff and played good defense behind him.

Jazzy struck out two batters looking and was unhittable for most of the night. Only one guy was able to hit the ball hard and he was wiped out thanks to the Tap Outs' defense. With some jabronie going for an inside-the-park home run, Scotty 2 Hottie fired a dart to DOB at home. DOB actually caught the ball and easily tagged out the guy at the plate.

That was the defensive play of the night. Nick the Quick also made a nice twisting catch out in right field on a ball that fooled him.

DOB, back for the first time in a month thanks to the rainouts and having to cater to his wife on her birthday, was 3 for 3 with two runs scored.

After the game, Kriss Kross said that "one player can't make a difference for a team" when talking about how former pro player Brandon DeJaynes is actually slumming it in Division 5. I had to point out that the Tap Outs are 2-0 with DOB in the lineup and 0-1 without. The numbers don't lie folks.

We were without several players as Hitman Hart (back), Jared (work) and Donny (exiled by the league? Just kidding).

We'll try to move to 3-1 next week when we play at 6 at Moorman Main. The old Uncle Bob's crew is our opponent. I miss the Merry Beavers.

Week 2: AFT 9, Tap Outs 4

After starting the season with a convincing win, Ted's Shirt Shack Tap Outs (formerly YOUR Herald-Whig Demons) were humbled at Upper Moorman Field by a young and hungry and unfortunately not drunk enough AFT team.

It was the first loss for the Demons, er, the Tap Outs, since the infamous "Thunder and Lightning and The World Ending" game two years ago when we were stopped by rain, lightning, thunder, hurricanes, floods, plagues of locusts and earthquakes.

AFT might has well stood for All Forgot To. As in, we all forgot to hit, field, pitch, show up in general. AFT took a 2-0 lead in the top of the second on two dumb errors and it just got worse, as the lifeless Tap Outs never threatened.

Things got interesting in the top of the seventh with the bases loaded and two out. Hit Man fielded a sharply hit grounder to short and threw to Donny (Don't Call Me Keith's Brother) Wiemelt, but the throw hit the sliding runner. Don't Call Me Keith then picked the runner up and gave him a pile driver into the dirt. Fortunately cooler heads prevailed and there were no further incidents. Had DOB been in the house, there would have been a riot and he would have pulled a heel move with a chair shot to the back when the umps weren't looking.

Speaking of DOB, he was playing nice and maintaining domestic bliss since it was his wife's "23rd" birthday and didn't show up. Without DOB, Incredi-Dumb Bell made his debut behind the plate and didn't let one ball get past him. He formed an effective battery with Jazzy Jeff making his season debut on the mound, but the defense let him down and AFT did hit the ball hard toward the end of the game.

Let's face it - without DOB, the spark of the team, the ying to our yang, there is no way we would have lost 9-4. We would have lost 9-2. But I digress.

DOB is back in the house next week and Hit Man gladly gives up the blogging throne and gives way to greatness.