Awards time
After another successful season, it's time to hand out year-end awards for The Herald-Whig Demons.
This is a committee of one voting - DOB. Don't like my honorees or want to add your own? Then leave a comment, sucka.
Without further delay, whoop, here it is:
Least Valuable Player: You'd think Ed, but you'd be thinking wrong. LVP for the 2006 Demons has to be King Carl. The guy showed up to one game, limped around, drank some booze and was never heard from again. What a slap.
Play of the Year: Shawny made several great plays in the outfield. The Weamster fielded his pitching position nicely in the upset of the Best Kept Lawn boys. But only one play stood out for the Demons this season, Ed's wedgie in right field.
Let's go back to May 11, shall we?
Play of the night goes to Ed in right field. After getting a shot sent his way in right field in the third inning, Ed's fielding effort will go down in the annals of H-W Demon history.
He fell on his wallet while trying to get the ball and then tried to throw while sitting on the ground without much luck. Ed took the next two batters trying to pull the undies out of his butt. It was the first time any of us had ever seen someone give himself a wedgie on the softball diamond. To make matters worse, Ed popped out to the catcher on his next at-bat, thus pulling off a rare double play of futility. Nice work, Ed.
Demons Rookie of the Year: After trying to hit fastballs for Quincy University's baseball team, Shawny was a fine addition, taking the roster spot vacated by the Charmin-like soft Murph.
Shawny shored up the outfield and gave us a two-hole hitter we can count on. Unlike Ed, who was cut after the finale, Shawny was given a lifetime contract with the Demons.
Outing of the year: Kriss Kross nearly knocked his brother, The Weamster, off the top of the heap here, but I'd have to say a 3-1 win over the league champs (Best Kept Lawns) trumps an 11-0 victory over the league chumps (U.S. Cooler).
The Weamster was in the zone all night against Best Kept. Even he couldn't believe how good he was that night. It vaguely resembled the night that MJ dropped a double nickel (55 points for those hipless readers) against the Knicks in his first return to the Garden after his first retirement.
Easily, it was the best game of the season by the entire team. That one win, which denied Best Kept from a perfect season, made up for the few clunkers we threw out there.
Bonehead Play of the Year: The Weamster wins this one, (broken right) hand down.
Seems the Weamster didn't like how things were going down in a 30-11 makeup loss to Snap-On Tools and decided to pound the ground. He wound up breaking a bone in his right hand in the process. Smooth move, Ex-Lax.
Word is that the Weamster will have to start the bowling season on the 15-day disabled list. I know his teammates are crushed.
Most Improved Player: It would be hard to bet against me wouldn't it? Compared to my Rookie of the Year campaign last year, I was much better and more at ease on the field. My batting average was only double what it was from 2005, checking in at .645 with 10 RBI.
Did anyone else move up the lineup like I did, going from 10th to 8th to third in the lineup and producing in every spot. I was like Jose Oquendo or Bert Campaneris, able to play any position the Weamster deemed me worthy.
All that and modesty to boot. I darn near was the team's MVP.
Most Valuable Player: As H-W sports editor, I vow never to go co-Players of the Year in our year end awards. There should only be one winner.
This could be like pee wee t-ball where I name everyone on the team the MVP, but I'm not going to do it.
Our team MVP put on a power display early in the season and was a rock at shortstop. He can throw a mean knuckleball, too, but has never been given the chance. When he was missing against Snap-On, the left side of the infield struggled. Hitman Hart gets the nod for his stellar play in the field and at the plate.
Also in the running were Kriss Kross, Eric, Shawny, and, of course, DOB. Yet it was the Hitman who was better than them all.
For those of you who haven't been mentioned, consider this a participation medal. Yes, even you, Ed.
After another successful season, it's time to hand out year-end awards for The Herald-Whig Demons.
This is a committee of one voting - DOB. Don't like my honorees or want to add your own? Then leave a comment, sucka.
Without further delay, whoop, here it is:
Least Valuable Player: You'd think Ed, but you'd be thinking wrong. LVP for the 2006 Demons has to be King Carl. The guy showed up to one game, limped around, drank some booze and was never heard from again. What a slap.
Play of the Year: Shawny made several great plays in the outfield. The Weamster fielded his pitching position nicely in the upset of the Best Kept Lawn boys. But only one play stood out for the Demons this season, Ed's wedgie in right field.
Let's go back to May 11, shall we?
Play of the night goes to Ed in right field. After getting a shot sent his way in right field in the third inning, Ed's fielding effort will go down in the annals of H-W Demon history.
He fell on his wallet while trying to get the ball and then tried to throw while sitting on the ground without much luck. Ed took the next two batters trying to pull the undies out of his butt. It was the first time any of us had ever seen someone give himself a wedgie on the softball diamond. To make matters worse, Ed popped out to the catcher on his next at-bat, thus pulling off a rare double play of futility. Nice work, Ed.
Demons Rookie of the Year: After trying to hit fastballs for Quincy University's baseball team, Shawny was a fine addition, taking the roster spot vacated by the Charmin-like soft Murph.
Shawny shored up the outfield and gave us a two-hole hitter we can count on. Unlike Ed, who was cut after the finale, Shawny was given a lifetime contract with the Demons.
Outing of the year: Kriss Kross nearly knocked his brother, The Weamster, off the top of the heap here, but I'd have to say a 3-1 win over the league champs (Best Kept Lawns) trumps an 11-0 victory over the league chumps (U.S. Cooler).
The Weamster was in the zone all night against Best Kept. Even he couldn't believe how good he was that night. It vaguely resembled the night that MJ dropped a double nickel (55 points for those hipless readers) against the Knicks in his first return to the Garden after his first retirement.
Easily, it was the best game of the season by the entire team. That one win, which denied Best Kept from a perfect season, made up for the few clunkers we threw out there.
Bonehead Play of the Year: The Weamster wins this one, (broken right) hand down.
Seems the Weamster didn't like how things were going down in a 30-11 makeup loss to Snap-On Tools and decided to pound the ground. He wound up breaking a bone in his right hand in the process. Smooth move, Ex-Lax.
Word is that the Weamster will have to start the bowling season on the 15-day disabled list. I know his teammates are crushed.
Most Improved Player: It would be hard to bet against me wouldn't it? Compared to my Rookie of the Year campaign last year, I was much better and more at ease on the field. My batting average was only double what it was from 2005, checking in at .645 with 10 RBI.
Did anyone else move up the lineup like I did, going from 10th to 8th to third in the lineup and producing in every spot. I was like Jose Oquendo or Bert Campaneris, able to play any position the Weamster deemed me worthy.
All that and modesty to boot. I darn near was the team's MVP.
Most Valuable Player: As H-W sports editor, I vow never to go co-Players of the Year in our year end awards. There should only be one winner.
This could be like pee wee t-ball where I name everyone on the team the MVP, but I'm not going to do it.
Our team MVP put on a power display early in the season and was a rock at shortstop. He can throw a mean knuckleball, too, but has never been given the chance. When he was missing against Snap-On, the left side of the infield struggled. Hitman Hart gets the nod for his stellar play in the field and at the plate.
Also in the running were Kriss Kross, Eric, Shawny, and, of course, DOB. Yet it was the Hitman who was better than them all.
For those of you who haven't been mentioned, consider this a participation medal. Yes, even you, Ed.
posted by PPGA Commish at 9:59 PM
3 Comments:
Ed is a disgrace to the game. Good riddance, loser.
I will donate my bonus and diamond ring for winning MVP honors to the guy building the new TGIF at 33rd and Broadway, so he has memorabilia to show off when he opens. - rh
Sprague's wedie/trying to be an athlete should have been filmed and sent to ESPN for a national laugh.
Extend his contract, baby. Who are we to make fun of?
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